Abode of Wisdom - خزانة الفوائد

On family relations Islam says:

From the point of view of Islam, husband is the breadwinner and guardian in the financial affairs of the family. Since the responsibility for providing the livelihood of the household and living expenses rests with him initially, therefore in matters such buying or selling of the house, carpets, clothing and household necessities, etc., the final decision and responsibility is with him.
About other affairs of matrimonial life it states:
1. He who marries must honor and pay deep respect to his wife.24

2. When a man enters his house he should make known his presence by calling out his wife’s name or greeting her tenderly.25

3. A woman (wife) who welcomes her husband warm-heartedly or sees him off to work or journey or stays with him in times of hardship has earned half the reward of a martyr that is promised by God.26

4. A good husband eats the kind of food his wife likes.27

5. The best of women is she who on going out of the house wears the armor of decency and chastity and when at home with her husband takes that armor off.28

6. Husbands should give a helping hand to their wives in the housework, like Imam Ali (the commander of the faithful) who would bring firewood or sweep the house and Fatima (a.s.) who would prepare the dough or bake bread.29

7. "A husband must never show any suspicion out of place towards his wife, because this leads a correct woman to evil and a chaste woman to deflection.”30

8. A father and a good husband on occasions, such as weekends or public celebrations should give gifts to the members of his household and give priority to girls over boys when handing out the presents.31

9. When a husband returns home from a journey he must make sure that he will arrive home at a good hour and take gifts with himself for the members of his family.32

10. How can a husband raise his hands against his wife? (Tenderness and roughness are in evident contradiction)33

11. If your wife gave birth to a girl do not be displeased for they have five advantages over boys:

• They are fonder of their parents and care of great help to their parents.
• They stay at home more often than boys and are of great help to their parents.
• Girls are fonder of their parents and lack toughness or coarseness.
• They are endowed with God’s blessings and mercy.
• They are more concerned about tidiness and show more diligence in cleanliness

12. Do not take a woman into consultation unless her wisdom and prudence is known to you.

13. “But consort with your wife in kindness and if it happens that ye hate her it may be that ye hate a thing wherein Allah hath placed much good. You do not know the mysteries of the world, even if you know some clear ones you know but little.” (Holy Quran, Al-Nisa’, 4:19)

14. "The best traits of woman are those which are the worst traits of men, namely: vanity, cowardice and miserliness. Thus, since the woman is vain she will not allow anyone access to herself; since she is miserly, she will preserve her own property and the property of her husband; and since she is weak-hearted, she will be frightened with everything that befalls her.”34

15. A father is obliged to fulfil four things binding on him for his children:

• Choose a becoming name so that his children are content with it.

• Educate his children. If all Muslims do so, illiteracy will be uprooted.

• Give them in marriage as soon as they reach the age of puberty.

• Teach them courtesy in manners and guide them for a practical life. Imam Ali (a.s.) did so by leaving a letter for his son, which is still being used by people for reference.

It may come as a surprise to some of our dear readers to state that there are more than hundred verses and traditions concerning the courtship of husband and wife in Islam.
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24. Bihar, 103/224
25. Bihar, 76/11&12
26. Wasail 14/17
27. Wasail 27/13
28. Wasail 14/15
29. Bihar vol 43/50
30. Nahjul Balagha, Letter 31.
31. Wasail 9692
32. Wasail 25220
33. Wasail 25323
34. Nahjul Balagha, Pg 618
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